My friend the sociopath

Christina+Benavides

Christina Benavides

Christina Benavides, Copy Editor

Some of us are whole hearted, and we are willing to accept almost anyone. Especially because those of us dealing with mental illness already feel cast off as abnormal. At least we sometimes feel that way, due to society’s standards.

Over two years ago, I met a person who changed my life, but for the worse. It was the first time I had ever met someone like them. They expressed to me that they were a “sociopath”, and this was a new term for me. I remember them telling me that they felt alone. I shared the same feeling, so without a doubt, I was there for them.

I have many regrets about the time I spent on this friend. I did not notice how toxic they were for me, but I am hoping to warn people who might have someone like this in their life or write this as a reference if they do run into a person like this. I’m not a mental health professional, and anything I do or say is either backed up with research or clearly stated as my opinion from personal experience.

According to Psychology Today, sociopathy is a behavior pattern derived from anti-social personality disorder. The cause of this disorder is unknown, but both environmental and genetic factors are involved. I personally call these individuals sociopathic or sociopaths, if they have this behavior pattern.

One of the main issues I have with the sociopath is their lack of remorse for others. The friend I knew who claimed to be a sociopath was able to hurt me emotionally without shedding a tear. They were heartless and cold. They would manipulate me, and make me feel like his wrongs were my fault. You could imagine how horribly this would affect someone’s mental health.

You might think that maybe this person lied to me about their mental health, however their mental state was very clear at the time. This person was not mentally healthy. I remember them talking about their homicidal thoughts, and the thoughts they had about homicide. They would graphically talk about this with me.

This sociopath also manipulated many women, that I personally did get to talk to at the time. They would get these girls to fall in love with them just to discard them. Then they would return and the cycle was endless. This person even openly admitted to using women countless of times.

These types of people do not normally have good intentions when they meet you. From my experience, it was traumatizing, and it took me so long to get over my interaction with a sociopath. It feels like they are playing a character because they behave exactly the way they need to in order to reel you in. They become this “perfect” person for you.

According to Health Guidance, sociopaths have a limited capacity to love, and have the ability to use others around them for personal gain. Adding, the reason they do discard you is because they are simply bored.

When I cut off ties with a sociopath, it felt like I lost someone who was close to me. That was the case for me, however in their eyes, it was just a game. I remember them telling me that. They never forgot to remind me that I was, “Just another piece in their game.”

My experience with the sociopath was a lesson learned. It was never my fault, and it is not your fault. I do want to warn anyone who does meet someone like this to be aware of their actions. If a person cares about you, they would never hurt you. Stay safe and always aware.